Saturday, September 29, 2012

There Are Times When Your "Support "Does Matter Lot !!!

      "To watch helplessly a life coming to a end prematurely is the most cruel thing in world"

      " In memory of one of my sister like friend who passed away to Breast Cancer recently -R.I.P Sister"

                                                                 In today's mechanical world the loss of sumone known matters for minutes --we just feel sorry for sum moments and then carry on with our work --almost forgetting the incident as a scary dream not worth remembering another time -Recently happened to witness some very terrible unfortunate incident after incident in my life altering so many feelings unexplainable ,the cruel end of a frds sister to breast cancer left me battered to pieces ---it did not seem a good idea to have belief and goodwill to defeat fate because there always seems only one winner - FATE .
                                                                 Recently a explanation  made by a friend in the funeral made me really take note off --He said and  I quote "Buddy i have been with this family for last one year --ever since i knew of the diagnosis of breast cancer --The family was broken to pieces and were struggling to accept truths --accept the pressure of financial pressures it brought about --the numerous hospital check ups --the eventual treatment causing her to become bald --and every day she was surviving with her family and couple of us giving her hope that she is winning the battle which she never was --my role was very minuscle --i just made sure i was there for her regularly --im not rich so i could not help her financially but i would go to her house to help her when she needed outside help--She lived 1 year more than doctors predicted--but the sufferings of family and her was beyond words --but every time i went to meet them --they felt better --they felt the inevitable was put off by few more minutes --after all u give sumthing that isnt costly but precious to them --"YOUR TIME "
                                                                He was true by every word --but to put to practice is  one of the hardest things imaginable --i personally know the pain of seeing my wonderful Mom pass away in front of my eyes --i could remember the last few days --i could exactly remember the people who made their sincere efforts to visit my mother out of true love and respect ,,not to mention the remarkable scene of witnessing my entire college batchmates aligning themselves to see  my mom one last time--a time when my collegemates became my friends --life changed --but that last few days --that last few moments meant a lot --it gave a few more moments in my magnificent mom's life --the last tear from her closed eyes touched my hand when i looked around to see the real people who gave those few extra moments to a noble life.
                                                               I probably never did that to many people in my life despite unfortunately being part of sum wonderful people's shocking ends to some ailment or another --which leads to me question --"Does ur support matter to people suffering some ailment ?"--The answer is a big definite "Yes"--For anyone u know in life --u owe a few moments --moments that u might never know but moments that might matter a eternity to their family --when my friend said the sufferings he saw of the frds sister --suffering from breast cancer --i closed my eyes --not able to hear more out of shock and shame --shame that i knew her end yet i hardly made a couple of visits ---that is the important thing --"u make a point to visit them with  giving them hope rather than taking what they have "---else never go .
                                                              She passed away at 33 --not seeing the wonderful things the world might have yet had for her --but i hope she was lucky to have had few souls who made sure she had hope till her last giving a few precious moments to her family --that needs a noble and hopeful heart --after all money cant buy some things --its left to us to make sure that message is passed on to our next generations ,The next time u see sumone suffering give them ur "time"whenever possible because there isnt a better thing in the world u could do to them --i missed  doing exactly that but when i came out i decided it wont happen again in my life --because my moms tear --tht last drop and those people who stood by then flashed in my mind --maybe its a cycle that i should have been a part and hope many of us would be --because our part might by minuscle but its important that we dont skip them --Sumwhere to sumone it might mean the whole world

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

"Words From A Hopeful Heart "

        " My heart is not missing a beat --I just feel this is my reality
          My reality was never in my dreams --my dream never became a reality
           But neither have i stopped dreaming nor i have forgotten my reality
          To dream ,to accept reality --in short-- to live  is all part of life
          A life without love but  with dreams -with fake smile and real tears
          Tears which shout "your name "
           Fake smile which silences those shouts
           My shouts reach only my ears and disappears through my heart
           My heart -a place which has endless love despite shocking pains
           Pains which made me better man but a fragile one
           A man who still searches for love fearing it might be in his past
           Past wont hold me back -Present will push me to my future
           A future with hope -with couple of my mates and hopefully bit of love
           Because after years of hopelessness --there is feeling of something blossoming
           A flower cannot blossom without sunshine --a man cannot live without love"
                                                                                  ---S  h  a  n -- :)                    

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Happy Bday Mom -The Greatest Human Being i Knew In My Life !!!

My Mother ----Happy 54 th Bday --On this day a few thoughts about u
       What was with those mesemerising eyes --everytime i saw them i saw only love !!
       Why was that face never a angry one --for the whole time i saw u i never saw one!!
       How was that smile so angelic for 21 years i was with u --never changed once !!
       How can it be true that i can still smell ur fragrance when i think about u ??
       I live the same life but why did it seem so magnificent then when u were there?
      Why you never forced me to do something for your wish --you had every right to do so!!
      Where was the magic wand i never saw that made me glue to your saree forever
      Why is that i dont remember much of my childhood without you ?
      Why you lifted me and walked  for 50 steps for 1 month  in school when i could not walk?
      Where was the confidence in me come from when i was anything but confident ?
      How were you patient endlessly despite getting pestered even at night 3 o clock for food?
                --perhaps u were just being what mothers are -u were just amazingly humble  always !

                   Now as a 30plus guy  with responsibilities and growing up in demanding lifestyles it makes me feel priveleged to have had that sort of person as  my mother --Yes i have tortured childishly ,i have pestered you endlessly --i have shouted you ---scolded you innocently --demanded more from you so much --yet why is that i cant realise one time u reacted against my seemingly stupid silly behaviours ,,Its just amazing how a mother treats her children --Only you mothers can do that --accept all our stupidity ,,ignore our silly behaviours ,smilingly waiting for us to grow !!

                  Ten years have gone since you left for your eternal voyage --but every year u seem fresher in my memory than the previous one --and every birthday of urs  it seems a voyage to my happiest years --returning to the best years of my life with the greatest human being i ever knew momentarily bringing those happiest smiles that sumhow i never felt again --maybe being part of a miracle made me forget that !!

                 These 10 yrs --i have yet to find a whole day of good food --i have yet to find sumeone whom u dreamed of being with me now--i m yet to find that special person who could end my loneliness --im yet to give life to few of my promises i made u --but what i have learnt without ur presence is immense --the value of life --the value of respecting people with true heart --value of never hurting sumone knowingly  --and most of all  "i have learnt to celebrate the life of a marvellous soul than to cry every day for not having u "
                When u went i felt u would hear me only if i cry --then i realised my silence could reach u --now i know u r with me always --even now whilst i write this i feel ur presence sumwhere around me with that angelic smile  --"To celebrate Life of Mom --Is like celebrating life itself"without u there is no life for me after all --:),,Thanks ,,Miss u and love u hell a lot