Wednesday, September 9, 2020

Happy Bday Mom -- Love u endlessly !!!!

 " Some memories are like snowfall that falls on you slowly forever 

    Wonderful ,beautiful and ever memorable "

    To the most  beautiful soul i had ever known in life ---Happy Bday Mom 

Mom where to start ----sometimes i just smile silently when i think about remembering u ---well to remember sumone u should forget them --u gave me too much love to ever forget u till im alive --u were the most beautiful  dream i saw without sleeping ---

"U are the sun in my brightest times ---u r  the moon in my darkest times" 

u not only gave me life ---u taught the value of loving people from heart --i always wondered how u could never hate anyone in life.



   Mother's  are the most aesthetically beautiful creation by god --Always wondered if he took extra time to make them ---because i have always found them to be the most selfless ,most caring and torchbearers of the word "love"in this world.

 My Mother was very special ,,,she was very very special when she left me ---now its been nearly 18 years --she well appears very very very special to me ---people who do see me after a time just keep uttering the same line ---you had a great mother and lovely parents ---the best thing about life is about being known as a son to lovely people -- no amount of fame or money can better that .

The wonderful mrng smile --that cuddle with ur hand on my forehead --that lovely hug while i slept --that magical angelic aura u had everytime i saw u --u were too good  a reality for a careless,disobedient son --but you will be the single  biggest reason for me always to believe that "love "is the solution to the toughest of situations ,

I still remember you uttering the words when ur end was  nearing ---"No matter what happens --i won't  give up "---and  by the way u fought everythin with sheer will power  and endless grit even death  would have felt ashamed to take the life of such a brave and lovely woman very very early ---i think maybe god was shortage  of good  souls he took early --but not  before you had given us all a life to remember and love u forever .

Happy Bday Mom ---I hope you are at peace wherever u r .You were the most precious gift i never knew i was blessed with --but now i know and will be the same till the last .Love u loads and endlessly.

Still awaiting your return ------until we meet again someday  probably  with u in my hands for a change to give back  part of all those endless love u gave  me :P :P :P.


Friday, April 3, 2020

"Life Is About Memories Too --Create Some New Now:)!!!

           
                    " Every story has a beginning ---and a end but in between them all lies the chapters 
                       we never know because we create them ---with one important factor  we always 
                       seem to have less  --TIME"

                     This  is of course a  totally unexpected issue thr whole world is encountering ---lockdowns have been forced in many nations ---people have been forced to be confined to their houses with their loved ones -the only biggest positive outcome of this terrible disease is that --for now time seems more --spent  with people we see everyday but never had time to sit down and talk about life ,about everything we go through and went through .

                       Honestly when u wonder what makes you smile  when you close ur eyes for  few minutes ---"MEMORIES"--in the fast paced world where you are pushed to earn more endlessly ,,to keep running with no end line at sight --this time given to u is a chance to  revisit the most precious moments and precious people in your life whom you might have not  had time to appreciate  their role in making you who you are in life .

                       I had this conversation with this close  friend with whom im not in touch but would do someday again surely would do ---we had a talk about life and memories --i remember that friend quoting 
                    " If life is like a sky the memories we create in life are like rainbows "

I never understood what he meant that day because life is a hazy picture that becomes clear as we grow old --now i  know  wht he meant  --life is  not about how much money u make  --how famous you are ---infact the less greedy you are --the more  happy you are in life !!1

                       Now is the  time to enjoy the beauties life has offered in your life that you never notice for quest for lifeless things -- talk to your  mother more after all she has talked to u so much while u were in your "first"darkness :)--talk to your father and thank him for all  his struggles--talk to your siblings for staying there always for you ---and most importantly remember and thank the souls who gave their time for you to be happy -- friends --we might have forgotten many of them in our relentless  quest --many of them might have been left behind ---this is your chance to make the people who made you what you are happy ---if you have  memories with people  that make  you smile  --now is your "time"to thank them ---have a word with them and make new memories.This is another opportunity "time"has given you to do that .After all everything alive will die one day but the memories never do ---it will keep passing from one to another life till this world is there --no corona can take them away !!

Saturday, September 21, 2019

As long as you live --forget the word "end " !!!

    This happened to me many years back ---when i was struggling to get over the toughest loss of my life --there was this marvellous motivation soul of my life,the best mate who made me fall even more in love with words  --who sat by my side and said probably the most important lines i forgot for a long time till a few days back .After the loss of my angel mom i was at loss of finding a reason to live life --She sat by me and our conversation was like this 

       Me --  Its excruciating to think i have to live a life without the light of my life -my mother --everything seems to be ending too fast 

      My Frd --   "LISTEN AS LONG AS YOU LIVE --FORGET THE WORD END --REMEMBER ONLY THE WORD "FIGHT "----YOUR MOM WAS THE BIGGEST EXAMPLE TO THAT "

She was perfectly right -- i had right in front of my eyes the one soul who never gave up -till her last --she kept uttering i will not give up for my children ---i never knew how gutsy she was till death eventually shamefully took that wonderful life --Everything  that has life has to eventually end --but thats just the beginning and end --the inbetween part is entirely ours--it doesnt matter how long or how short our time is in this world ---if we keep believing there is still time to realise atleast few of our countless dreams.

Despite countless troubles ,endless hurdles .improbable situations ,unbearable losses --just keep telling yourself --this is not the end ---as long as you live you can still make things better --there was short few lines  i read few years back --which makes life is what u make of it --more than what it makes u look like to everyone.Those lines were 

      " If you see every loss of something /someone as a leaf falling from a tree --then you will always feel there will be a new one growing in tht tree soon ---Never lose hope--as long as u live -just forget the word "end "!!!

   

Friday, March 15, 2019

Happy Bday To A Unforgettable Wonderful Human Being - Happy Bday Dipu !!


(The last six months of  my life has been the most depressing i have been in my life --- for the second time i was suffering from depression -- and i knew i was battling depression when i failed again and again to do what i loved most --write what my heart wanted --it was the only way i could speak from my heart for i was not a good a orator and nothin much else--pardon me if this blog  seems different because its like im restarting again for the best friend of my life --i have had many but  now i have almost none but u were there always in my past , present and  will be sumehow in the future too ---Happy BDay Daps)



" Your life is good if ur memories slide one by one leaving at the end with tears of untold joy in ur eyes "---To one beautiful soul who has been in the best and worst part of my life  as a wonderful supporter no matter what --being just what he promised to be when i met him more than a decade and half ago--"A True Friend")

                                             If at all there was a award for someone who made such a large amount of  true friends purely through social media ---it had to be me :p--i was damn lucky to have had met some wonderful gems through online --Here's the "Achilles heel" i learnt though that comes along with that tag of having many  online friends ---not all of them stick with u through ur good times and bad times --they just wither away due to fate and extreme level of expectations --but what won't wither is the beautiful memories u had with them -- the thought of  their desertion in your most desperate times will be a minor glitch in the whole beautiful picture (i hope to go in detail sumday :P).

                                           Sandeep Sheoron --- The first interaction with you was funny with your stupid shawn michaels dp in orkut searchin a friend with same name like me --fortunately or (unfortunately for u )--u sent a friend request that still remains the most important friend request i got in social media --i formed a chain from u to make so many of ur friends mine and their friends mine too --i was so fond of making friends that i failed to find the best ones among all the good ones --I realise now that it is as important to be true to sumone to expect them to be same to u,,its to me the most important trait in being a true friends,unfortunately i realised my mistakes bit late but letting go is also a art i guess --a part of life which is a must .

                                           Your memories with me go back a long time -- i used to have the best times with u while online chatting --- you --with a terriifc sly sense of humour ---a brute honesty - a heart that is the softest in the world ---which was rightfully given to another wonderful soft hearted soul --eventually being rewarded with "The brightest little angel in the whole world "--you have everythin in life because u deserved nothing less --if at all wishes had wings i wish it could fly to u and tell how many i have---they are countless--for a wonderful human being even the best things in this whole world wont be enuf .

                                           Nowadays we don't have time to know each other more --nowadays there is no time to crack jokes --no time to write mails --no time to talk -its the usual life of all frustrated "family responsible guys in the thirties "--we will keep running to reach one goal after and another --not realising what we are leaving behind ---we eventually run a race to our destiny all alone --but no destiny could erase the beautiful memories u gave me --the shoulder u gave me when i needed them (before this watsapp ,facebook revolution which i truly hate now :P),u are truly a brother i will happily take to me to even the toughest roads of life ---You will always be my lucky charm ,,my closest friend and now one of the few leftover good ones left in my life ---Thanks for being there and keep making many others life a living heaven by being urself in all their lives too ,,Have a wonderful bday with all around ,,,as for my gift ,,,,u have already got it :P:P:P!!!!--Have fun -luv u loads brother always ,,,,,till my last)

Sunday, September 9, 2018

Happy 60 th Bday Mom --Luv U forever !!!

 "Every time i see stars shining in the night time ---I feel you would be sumwhere there shining        brightly as you did in my life -- Happy Bday Mom -- your words will always be my guiding light"


                                           


For those who are reading this --If you have your mom with you ---go love her more -- hug her once again  --- thank them for their endless unconditional  love --i do the  same to my mom pic !!!











Thursday, August 30, 2018

Happy Wedding Anniversary To The most Wonderful Couple I Ever Knew In Life -My Parents !!!

             " Not everyone you meet you in life can be always  lovely ,always  wonderful , ever caring , mesmerisingly unforgettable  forever ---because no one will ever be like your " PARENTS".

Still remember everythin u taught me when u were with me  and after that too - MOM 
                                              I lost my wonderful angelic mother in 2002 in such a sudden shock that shook my entire life , i had the most wonderful 20 years of my life with her ,i remember as a eight year old how my mom celebrated my birthday as the biggest function in her life -- her love made me always as a 8 year old who refused to grow up believing the best time of my life will forever be stagnant ---but life has its own ways to wake u up and throw u to the wolves --to see whether you survive or just become a prey to the wolves in different forms of our lives waiting to pounce on us (I guess everyone who is in their mid life knows who and what these wolves are --they have so many different names and forms but their sole aim is to destroy us :p).
           



                                                There was this journey during her last few months that i realised i was not born to a great woman ---i felt i was a son to the most wonderful human being to have graced this world --even in her last few months she never cared about her --she kept asking the welfare of all of her close ppl --there was so many nights where i did not know what was coming and how much my wonderful mom was suffering ---i was just  that eight year old who thought one fine day all will be fine and i will be playing with her as always ---just that the " fine day" never arrived  -- some other day arrived ---one where i was forced to grow to know i was not a eight yr old anymore -- i was scared to live a day in a day without her but somewhere in everyone of those dark days i felt a ray of light --a hope in the most hopeless situation ---in every tough situation i could hear her words --i could see her grit in tough times as a example to fight anything life throws --In short she had prepared me to fight life with her and ,,,,,without her too .

Noone really cares about you like your DAD .
     "For everyone their first hero is their Dad - for me he will be the most important of all my heroes "

                                                      My dad was always my first hero as it is for all kids ---but one day in the summer of 2007 changed my perception of him forever - he became the hero i will forever remember in toughest time of my life ---i got a sudden call from my brother saying suddenly father had encurred a serious stroke  -- on the way to hospital our family doctor told us he should not fall unconsious as it would complicate the stroke ---we all three had not got married and we had no relatives support (our only support had been the people we met in our lives and stayed with us always ---our friends)--- on reaching the hospital he was placed in ICU and doctors had told it was critical that for the  next 48 hours  he should not fall unconsious as the stroke had happened in critical spot in brain ---me and my brother stood by him as he was tryin to speak sumthing --his speech was slurred of the sudden stroke --yet he tried to say something - me and my brother went to hear what he was saying --he just said very hardly yet very sternly ---" Dont Worry --i wont leave until i had fulfilled your mother's wishes and my duties "--We left reluctantly and came next morning --and the doctor just said --"Your dad saved himself by his own will power --he did not sleep even one minute --hes no ordinary man --and patted us on the back sayin --Don't worry"
                 
                                                      Your parents are the biggest gifts god gave you in life ---cherish them till they are with you --this journey called life from the beginning is never easy ---but nobody gives you more reasons to enjoy life than them --the memories they give you are countless and ever efferevscent --their words guide you in the most toughest moments --after all the journey might be urs but the path will always be what they showed you --to my parents who showed how to love ,how to respect ,how to live your heart in everything you do ---to two wonderful people who i will forever be indebted in life --- Happy Wedding Anniversary ---Thanks for the wonderful things you teach in life by being with me dad  and mom ,,,in your case ---thanks for still being with me even though u r not with me ---ur words will always be the light of my life ---I hope to you see you someday in the other side  maybe as a eight year old again :) ----until then keep watchin all of us getting old and your man---gettin even older and lovelier than ever !!!!




                            
                                                



Tuesday, July 10, 2018

After a point in life ,, you are just judged by wrong things and not for what u r - Doesnt matter-Just soldier on!!!!!

  " When i  was a kid life seemed like a circle where it was only about good
     When i grew up it was like a square where i ended up with good after bad times
      But now ,,,,its  like  a  never ending zig zag line !!!!"

 ( Disclaimer : To those who like only  feel good blogs and sugar coated lies plz skip this blog as this is strictly for fanatics who know the meaning of the word "LIFE")

                                     I'm gonna quote three different times in my life which has made me realise that there is nothing as fascinating as the life we live in --Our incidences may differ but the fascination of them are for one unique purpose only --to know the meaning why do we exist in this world .

28 th March ---- Some beautiful memories in the 90's--Nothing but love--Life as a circle  !!
                                       I had my best years in my life with the some of the most beautiful souls i ever knew in life ---i had a small family but as all of you a wonderful ,wonderful one ---as a kid the birthdays were the days u wait for the whole year ---i was no different but was different --i had no friends --i had my school teachers as my best friends and my family as the delightful star cast who celebrated my bday more than me -life was about smiling on the shoulders of my angel mom who knew nothing other than love for her children and family - she lived with me for such a short time but it was the best short time of my life with the person closest person to god in real life showing me life in the best meaningful way possible --my memories of that time have remained with me because all that i had were memories of ppl who gave me endless unconditional love .I had funny gifts like a green elephant from my dad --lifting me countless times --making me the happiest kid with the best memories of my life ,how i wish my life was stagnant then forever .But nothings lasts forever in life except "MEMORIES "!!


October 2002 - A lesson of endless love from a angel  -- When hope stayed through love !!!
                                           My last year in graduation was unexpectedly the most unforgettable -as i never knew i would say farewell to the angel of my life in the most brute manner possible --fate was trying to take my mother away swiftly --but what i witnessed was not just case of fate winning --it was a heroic fight of a love battle hardened woman who refused to be defeated by fate --because she had yet to witness her children settle down in life --she had yet to see her better half  grow old enuf to say gudbye --- one night in a famous hospital in chennai --while i was spending the night witnessing  her in bed in worsening health but refusing to show that to a young me --who thought waking up everythin would be fine --every single day --but that night i realised that not everythin is rosy in life -- i slept not knowing her endless pain but got to know the next day she did not want to disturb me in sleep --that was pure unconditional love --the last stages of unconditonal love i got in life was from the angel of unconditional love to all children --MOM ,But the untimely demise of my wonderful mom gave me different perspective of life through many friends --each of them showing a glimpse of the love i had got from the time i knew about myself .Life though in the most horrendous of times still showed me there is an oasis in such wretched times ,there was a feeling that despite everything love will prevail not anythin else ---only to be proved wrong later !!




Now,,,,,,,The realisation that it is not about love anymore --Its about Money ,Ego and Loneliness !!!
                                             After a certain point in life you realise that it is not about love in life anymore ---Something else would have overtaken that so silently and rudely --To put it in simple few lines i would like to quote

                  "  Your life now is about money you earn --ppl respect you accordingly
                      Your life is surrounded by people with egos bigger than you imagined
                      Your best friend is loneliness courtesy of those magical words "Money " and  "Ego"

                                             It hurts when your best mates judge you for money you earn --it hurts when respect is not about the person you are  --it hurts more when your best friend ditch you for a monster called "Ego" --it hurts when loneliness has put a arm around your shoulder and walks around as if it is your best friend.Life seems surely goin in a zig zag way with no destination at sight .

Yet ,,,,,Life will not end up this way i guess --as one of my best mates ( who lived all of 26 years,and sumone i wish i could have had now )  that keeps ringing me in my ears more than ever now

    " Life is like a butterfly - A butterfly may eventually look beautiful --but to reach that stage it has to go through so much transformation --like that you will have to go through endless peaks and troughs to know the real meaning of your life--No matter what happens --Life will go on !!!!