Happy 34th wedding anniversary papa and mom -luv ya both !!!!!

           To the best couple and great human beings i have known in my life --happy 34th wedding anniversary Dad and Mom

                                     Aug 31 will forever be etched in my memory as the most unforgettable date,,where life starts is what people forget the most because its hard to remember --but for a mom and dad our beginning is the real beginning --they change to our needs from that moment --its like our life is like a book--we write everythin inside it because its our own life ,,but the cover and appearance of the book is given by our parents --exactly "character " in literal terms of our life ,,they shape the beginning to have a life we desire
                                   How many of us remember the intial few yrs of our lives---its hard but i have been priveleged to have had two great people as mom and dad ,,,i remem very well how i used to hold the end of my moms sarees fearing for school and how she will wait in the gate for whopping 3 hrs waiting for me in burning heat --standing near the gate just to prevent me from cryin -ok all moms do that initially --heres the amazing fact -she did it for my whole school life ---whopping 14 years!! ---my dad went a step ahead  and did it till my graduation in college ,,whopping unbelievable 18 years ---i think myself --even though im single now ,,if and when i get married i cant imagine being 10 percent of what they were together 

                                 34 th wedding anniversary it is for both of them ,one of them is safely watchin from above ,destined to be seperated by only death --which eventually got jealous of them both being so true to each other ,,decided to take my mom hell a lot early to see if it meant the bonding ended there,,,it did not ,,my dad gamely carries on and still feels mom in anything he does --almost 9 years later,,everythin tht happened with them both were serene ,calm and awe inspirin ,,if sumone says they were not inspired by their mom and dad they ought not to be born at all,,no matter where u go ,,with whom u go ,,where u end up with --they were the beginning --every beginning is a hopeful dawn --for every parent on their children ,,the value of their work is realised only  when we become a parent!! .
                                 A unfilled void for life was  created by the passing away by a mother who i envy even now for how good she was ,,a beautiful fighter till the last--always felt even death felt sorry to take life of such  wonderful human being so early ,,a blotless life,,a life with all the fulfillments a woman wishes in her life,,a angel who chose her hubby who was equal good as her ,,the most iron willed man i have known ,,,even a serious medical ailment still gets defeated by the stubborn will power ,,i have wondered were they each other handpicked by god to be together ---i have met many couples but noone goes above them ,,not just because they were my parents ,,they were tht good,,,i hear even after all these years people sayin the same whenever i meet old frds of them ,,in a world where divorces and misunderstandings are order of day their life seems alien ,,they were never far away from each other till moms last breath 
                               I never wished for anythin whilst the time i kept admirin them both on every weddin anniversary till 2002 ,,,and even after that i keep wishin them ,,not everyone got what i got --spending time watchin the most ideal couple i have known --by bein that true --showing me what was life - i have treasured every moment of the past ,,making sure their vision together is realised by playing some part of mine in that ,,
                 "To mom---i know u are watching this and shedding a tear for not being with dad ---just know hes with capable hands --the hands u never let go when we were born --ur children will make sure he celebrates lot more wedding anniversaries before meeting u again sumtime --anythin i achieve is of u both ,,even if i dont achieve anythin --i was born to u both --that itself is a unparalled pride and privelege which surpasses anythin i do in my lifetime "
               "Happy wedding anniversary--mom and dad --love u both for all u did and doin in my life --its priceless and unforgettable  "

" Humanity should prevail--Hanging is inhuman "

"The painful scene --the pain will remain but is hanging the convicts  the medicine to this pain-rather prefer to leave it to almighty "

                       " A humble heartfelt thought--Why not give a opportunity to the convicts to live their lives  --let them learn their lesson rather than us tryin to teach them "

                        "May 21 -1991"--A black day in Indian history --Rajiv gandhi--one of indias brightest prospects of a leader,former prime minister then,was so cruelly killed in a bomb blast ,,the pictures of the assasinated leader lingers in our minds 20 years after the incident ,,The people associated for the cruel incident were found and arrested soon,,three of the convicted are supposed to be hanged soon,,is it right ?thats the question that seems to linger in our minds

                         Not without reason --though im against the convicts claimin innocence --its atrocious to be claiming that as evidence have been concrete enough ---the point is that having being confined to the darkness of a room,,having been cut off from family ,,cut off totally from outer world ,,left to regret their mistakes for 20 long years --every day ,every minute would have gone with the pain of being part ofsumthing wrong if it is the truth--they must have done soul searching for 20 long years ,,having lost their youth their dreams ,,with just a unknown world to accompany them ,,would it not be right to give a flicker of  hope that the same persons may come out and live the rest of his /her life in a better reformed way

               "Let the human life complete it due course --why do sumthing when it is meant to happen in sum point of everyones life--truth is we did not enter the world at our wishful time why is it we must fix a time for sumones end--there is sumone who takes care of that of every human being in this world--GOD..we are humans --if we cant show care,kindness, and most  importantly "FORGIVENESS"--then whats the point of living  a life,,the crime is of the highest order but what is the message are we giving out to future people by acting so inhuman ??

              Rajivji was one of my favourite leaders in my young age ,,i admired his charmed personality ,,his talks,,it was a shock to millions like me who admired the great leader ,it hurts that his life was cut short so mercilessly, --it was a sad reoccurence of personal revenge taken upon him much in the same way of his mother Shrimati.Indira Gandhi ,,while we all carry the pain its just not right to have "revenge for revenge "feeling,,because if we do this all we are certifyin that,,

              I feel if we give a opportunity to them sumwhere we might start sumthin good ,,it should not be of the attitude "We are goin to teach a lesson to the person who is convicted by hanging"rather it should be  "why not allow the person to learn his lesson"--i wish it was so because sincerely dont wish to see this as a continuin trait in our country which is known for showing humanity and kindness ,,taking a life should not be in our hands --its left to GOD---and its left to him to show his kindness to these tortured souls and give them a opportunity to live a better life --all i can do is hope and pray to him !!!

"I Will Miss U Always But Im Letting U Go -My first Step Without U begins Now "

                   " Memories either move u forward or pull u to standstill completely"

                   "I miss her so much bro i cant do anythin"--- I heard this from one of my frds brother few weeks back  who had broken with his girlfrd of 4 yrs --and i could see literally what he was meaning when i met him then ,,He was suffering with pain,broken heart ,,life was a hazy mist for him then when i saw --actually it is couple of months since then ,,i saw him again this past weekend ---nothing had changed --he had quit his job --refused to go and meet his parents who lived far away ---in short he brought his life to standstilll for missing sumone

                 Missing sumone is part of life in everyones case,,the relationship may differ ,sum may miss their dear ones who lost their lives,,some their love ,,thats how the world works,,, there is not one soul in the whole world who lives without missin sumone dear ,I felt the same thing sumwhat related to me personally as well ,,,Yes truly and dearly the most important person i miss is my mom --but i have always felt though i miss her like hell ,,i felt she was with me always ,,and it only propelled me to be a better person,,but there is one another person whom i miss hell a lot ,,my days dont end without her thought even once -- but sumtimes u need to see life in its own perspective

               Missing sumone is probably harder than any feelin in the world ,,,to miss sumone in first place u must have loved them that much ,only our hearts can explain why we felt that wonderful with that person because no logical and analytical analysis wil give the right answer for that,we dont miss everyone we know--there will be very very special cases,,some special people with whom we had shared some wonderful moments ,,some magical moments ,,whatever the cause of missin that person,break up,deceased ,anger ,ego ,,anythin,,,the best way appreciating that wonderful bonding --the best way to pay tribute to the relationship is "MOVING AHEAD WITH THOSE HAPPY MEMORIES"

             Personally i have had this feeling ,,this pain,,this feeling of sumthin tragical has happened when i least expected to--Im missin sumone badly --but why im left to gaze the skies for a answer?why im being left to feel as if my life has come to a standstill sumtimes ?-----Today i found a answer to that --"Im carryin sumone else alongwith me --more than what i could "---in reality im in danger of losing my dreams and not giving myself  a chance to achieve sum great ppls dreams who hoped i might try to realise them never mind achieving them ,My moms absence was just physical ,,but this feels mental ---the only way forward is "LETTING U GO "

            While its hard to convince sumone else on this ,,but its not hard for me to try and implement the same ,,i might not have helped him much -,,but i realised there is a way for everythin and not everythin that happens in the world is implausible--there is a reason for everythin --if i miss u now --it may be a reason fr finding sumone who was destined to be with me --maynot be a special sumone but a unique sumone .

          So i decided after long thought --"I will miss u like hell--there wont be another like u --but i want our frdship have the real respect it deserves --Im"LETTING YOU GO "from me --thanks for the memories --i have treasured them --now its time to move on and find more treasures like u-who knows whats in store -my dreams are waiting for me to start persuading them again,,im starting again with just  clean air in my lungs -of course i will miss u forever --and a few others but  from now on nothing will stop me tryin to go for my goals :)

IM WITH ANNA HAZARE--IM AGAINST CORRUPTION--LETS JOIN HANDS AND SHOW OUR SUPPORT!!!!

                   A 74 year old veteran ,,a renowned  social activist ,a Padma Bhushan award winner  for his social work on a village ,,a gandhian ,,a veteran who has stood against innumeorus bad omens of the society ,,he is very wellknown for his struggle against alcholisms via the  organisation "Tarun Mandal" formed by him ,,,his fight against corruption in the Lokpal Bill is very well documented to all of us ,,Yes im talkin about Mr.Anna Hazare

                  With the news of ruling government arresting him in the mornin  and eventually announcing that he is released in the evening shows how pathetic our government has become frightened by the fears of being exposed maybe because some of the explanations given were atrocious ,,I heard sumone sayin in the news channel that he is doing it agaisnt law,,so he is arrested ,,,5 YEARS BACK --"MAMTA BANERJEE"--SHE WAS IN A HUNGER STRIKE FOR 25 DAYS --U ARRESTED HER --MADE ANY STIPULATION LIKE WHAT U HAVE DID NOW? DONT HAVE MORE THAN 5000 SUPPORTERS ,,,3 DAYS FASTING --LEAVE DELHI,,HOW MUCH  MORE ---One mans fight against these people seems impossible ,,one old veteran who considers his life as nothin but for  welfare of the nation as the main objective,,r we watchin,,r we listenin?

                 To all the people of India --this is a time for mass appeal against corruption --against bad omens ,,against power ridden society ,,"ANNA HAZARE IS NOT ALONE --WE R ALL HERE TO SHOW HE IS NOT "-Its not about "South Indian" or "North Indian"--this is about "Indian",, Please for a minute think ,,for a fight of such a noble cause ,,for a fight against a monster that might kill our nation ,,we have to set aside our differences ,,our caste issues ,,our individualistic thoughts ,let there be no arguement ---let there be just one opinion ---"WE ARE AGAINST CORRUPTION "--a old veteran will not be  made to accept power ridden peoples conditons   as long as we r there ,,we formed the government --we have every right to fight against it when it acts unfair 

               Because if we dont do now ,,we will never do it for our lifetimes ,,what we will leave future generations will be  a image of cowards a image of people who feared all life to speak against this monster ,,corruption has to end sumwhere or India will end sumwhere ,,"we will fall-- not our nation",,,lets join hands ,,we cant revolutionise a society by being individuals ,,thats why we need to show our support sumone who is starting the protest against issues like corruptions 

             Hazare ji has been blackmailed to accept the conditions or face the consequence ,,we fight for our rights ,,we will use our rights to kill the monster "corruption"--our unity will be the force to demolish the demon to pieces--i felt very bad seein how much such a old person is being treated badly for fighting agaisnt a huge evil act called corruption  with just non violence as his weapon ,,by showin our support we are not indulging in any violence but showin our ruthless support against corruption,against power ridden people ,,to be a example to future generations that when sumthing wrong happend we stuck together --that we fought sumthin bad by being together

           HAZAREJI ---U R NOT ALONE --WE ARE ALL WITH U --WE  WILL  FIGHT CORRUPTION --WE  WILL FIGHT POWER RIDDEN GOVERNMENTS --WE MIGHT FALL --NOT OUR NATION -MY SUPPORT TO U -----AS WILL BE MANY ---WITH GOD AND TRUTH BY OUR SIDE --THIS WILL END IN GOOD FOR US  -- PLEASE DONT GIVE UP--INDIA IS AWAKENING-- ITS TIME TO KILL THE MONSTERS--WE CAN -WE WILL !!

              

"Freedom ---A Wider Perspective "

                             15th Aug 1947 --forever will be etched as the most important date in our Nations history ,,Mother India became independant with efforts from millions of people sacrificing their lives and therefore giving us a free and democratic country ,,but the real question is  have we realised their dreams ,,r we using the freedom they struggled so hard to build a India they so dearly wanted long after they had gone ??

                    *   Freedom as visualised by the great ppl of past included India moving forward ,,but we try in  one  way or other to pull each other back thereby not letting India to grow ,every govt that comes in finds out the fault of the previous one or one against but there are no concrete plans given for the country to move forward ,whether in state or centre ,,same story ,,and if sumone raises the concern ,,hes beaten to pulp or ignored to hilt , One word may aptly mean what we are doin -Is it "Selective Democracy-Probably Yes is the answer  ,,Freedom doesnt mean to have the freedom to have our identities restored safely ---we did not get freedom for singular identity surely.      

                    *    A journalist in this free india---Mr,J.Dev a investigating reporter for a newspaper voiced his concern over crimes of underworld was shot dead in broad daylight --freedom of voicing true concerns is not allowed and it comes at a price of losing life!!

                   *    Anna Hazare - a renowned social activist,,a padma bhushan award winner for his services,,a Gandhian,voice his concern over corruption and took protest against corruption in non violence way (i dont support idiots like ramdev ) hes being --as on date being stopped from all his efforts by the ruling govt ,,pathetic ,,  freedom for taking steps to reform a  major issue spoilin our nation  from a  highly respected individual is  condemned    

Irom sharmila -

                  * How many of us know know IROM SHARMILA??The iron lady of manipur --she is in indefinite fast for 10YEARS ASKING   FOR ELIMINATING A CONTROVERSIAL LAW that saw her village ppl being mowed by police and illtreated including raping and killing  girl in her place--the price for her struggle ,,she has been arrested numerous times and law still exist--Independant India is suppressed by such poor actions for fight against unjust ---Remember Gandhiji and so many of freedom fighters fought for independance because of unjust treatment ,,,yet when the same is being rendered in parts of India nowadays  ,,,we are just witnesses doin nothin

                   Were we granted freedom to develop hatred ,caste wars,be witness to all wrong doings ,to be clients of corrupted ppl?or accept idiots like Ramdev and Nityananda(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgzVJwoFtSg&feature=related) as people higher than us (Im not here to hurt intentions of people who follow them but i post a video of that Nityananda here to show that its not just me who is against ppl like this ),the saddest thing is we cant use our freedom to fight against unjust ,,fight against our fear to use our rights is freedom in a way ,,individual priorities make us fear of any bad eventuality ,,but if we dont use our freedom to fight agains.t such happenings ,,then our future generation will have no freedom to do anythin,,they will be mere slaves to such people ,,do we want that state?

                    Freedom was hard earned ,,Mother India was independant after monumental struggle ,,millions of people sacrificed their lives with the belief that their vision of a beautiful bright India will be realised by future generations ,,We are now one among the future generations but have we done enuf to make them happy ,,,have we done our bit to fight our fears and stand for just ?,,,the day we realise freedom is standing for just ,,the day we realise freedom is fighting our fears and execute our rights and care for each other,therby lifting our country to heights which those great people envisioned will be the day all their sacrifices would become meaningful in the real sense  ,,probably its one of most impossible tasks ever ,,,  So what even our freedom was thought to be so by foreigners ,,we got freedom by the hardest way possible ,now its left to us to do it the harder way to make sure all the efforts of our heroes is not wasted by us,,We may go,,but as long as the world exist we should make  Mother India shine  as brightly as possible and celebrate as many independance days  probably as long as the world exist,,

"I Promise to do my bit --Proud to be a Indian,Long live my Mother India  -Jai Hind !!!!"

                

We Guys have our moments in sunshine despite the gloom !!!

                            There are not enuf praises to talk about women alrite ,,but we need sum sunshine sumtimes ,lol,,,Guys --epitome of the word responsibility --Tommorow is rakshabandan --i was wondering how much it is appreciated for the efforts of guys in this world ,,minimal ,very minimal ,,just even imagining how much pressure   a guy soaks up  once he crosses the teens is unimaginable

                            They say a girls heart is the deeper than a ocean ,,but i would say the hearts of guys are like the skies which are always so clearly visible ,,both are unique thats why the world maybe a tough place to exist but nevertheless a interesting one ,,for most part guys --we dream of so many things --but as life goes with responsibility we leave the dreams and live in what is given or forced to live with what life is serving ,,the hardest part in life is living a life forced of fate and seein our dreams slowly fade along with the breeze ,,its that tough being a male .

                         Dads wants sons to be better than them in the field they shine or wished to shine  ,,in a way the pressure ,responsibility starts from there ,,once u cross 10 u r expected to be matured,, once u cross 15 u r expected to manage few ppl ,,once u cross 20 u r expected not to cry,,,then not to show emotions ,,if u dont fit the bill anywhere u r viewed as a irresponsible ,careless ,,attitude showin person,,it really is,,personally felt few of them ,,thats why i feel sumtimes so proud to be a guy ,,because we stand in front of a storm knowing it will take us away sumday ,,sumhow ,,still we dont show our backs ,,as a old  sayin,,"Be a man as u r ",,

                          Yes we see life before marriage as a opportunity to look into every girl we encounter as a hope of sumthin spl ,,nothin wrong ,,thats how our hormones work ,,not our fault ,,but in 99 percent of them we know its just a nice good person to know  ,,except for the 1 percent where we feel "this is the girl " --and then comes the drama of fate ,,only very few get the chance to live a life with them ,,others dont and they  adjust their  minds to reality and spend a life with sumone else ,,we are not allowed to emote ,,but the pains stay deep,,,yet we live a life and give it a good shot ,,be true to the one we are fixed ,,and till the final breath carry the memories in mind and give a smile to conceal the pain

                        Its hard to be a dad ,a brother ,a husband ,,a responsible son,,at all these roles guys encounter losses of sumthin all life yet nothin derails us from achieving the purpose of every individuals life,,,devoid of living the life with the girl u wish ,,takin away the sister with whom u live for 25 years --try whatever after that even sisters become another family --the family torch is passed to guys in hope they carry it with pride and better fame and name ,im sumone who always had always been in awe of the sacrifices girls make and have great respect for  them --- they make a guy sumone in this society ,,but for that guy to be that sumone everyone wishes ,,its aint that easy ,,"our sacrifices are rarely known ,,our emotions are best expressed in the mirror of our washrooms ,,for sum in the cars in long distance night drives all alone ,,our tears are confined to ourselves ,,our pains confined to darkness ,,,our love as another dream ,,our affection for our sisters with a time limit to show ,,our dreams dying at the hands of harsh reality ,,but yet we carry on--to make others happy ,better ,,at the least comfortable !!!

                     From a guy who has felt every bit of words written above yet feel so proud to be a guy --its a privilege to live with responsibility and care even if it comes at cost of our dreams and happiness ,,,Still its a pleasure being one among them  :)

Hoping there will a better tommorow!!!

                    "U may not be my life --but u were part of it which i will never regret --thanks "

                

The next generation's happiness depend on us,we have a role too!!!

                               Will anyone say this at a inevitable unfortunate time -- therby giving hope and not having hatred -I doubt!!! --- I got this very words ringing in my mind when i recently witnessed a good frd ending his strained relation with his wife amidst chaos ,abuse and curses which were hard to even witness ,,do seperation or breaking up a relation be so rude and appear so bad ?--It was my take ,,and to make matters worse the reason for their seperation was plain silly --but we are living in a society where "silly is significant in almost everythin ",,i was not a close frd of them neither i could do anythin to stop the string of bad events that happened ,but i just wished only if ppl realised that there needs to be respect even in seperation ,,abusin ends what all is left ,,why do that --but when will each one of us be a example of takin moral responsibility for a  inevitable  seperation of any relationship,,When will we move with a smile or a hanshake or a hug of any relationship and end it all with hope it may come back sumday rather than killing it forever

                                      No one wants to be a example for hatred ,,but sadly no one wants to be a example for being against it as well ,,the moment we start to hate sumone ,,bingo we find reasons to solidify our stance ,,we find our side to be the fair one ,,we find the other person as a villain,,im sayin this seein relationship between brothers ,,between lovers,,between husband and wife and many relationship ,,for me it has been blew hot blew cold types with certain friends ,,i have not had guts to be so even though every time i felt i will change it whenever sumthin inevitable happend ,,like seperation,,breaking a frdship ,,at these times we either become helpless or become arrogant enuf to go to extent of abusin the person with whom we shared some good moments ,,,

                                   No relation is foolproof ,,its how we learn to take the more of good things than the bad ones ,,if we feel the bad ones are more and good ones are less we should make ourselves a reason for a good one ,,not the other way around ,if u feel that seperation is the option why not do it with a good heart , by doing that  sumwhere when said and done we leave a window for a good happenin,,never mind if it happens or not ,,we still have the satisfaction that we did not completely end that relationship ,,we can sleep with the belief that "sumday sumwhere if fate wants we will be atleast half as what we were once upon a time",,  life might end anywhere ,,anytime ,,,but when it counts ,,when we live ,,its important we live without guilt and without hatred ,,,No one is right everytime ,,makin a relationship is that hard ,,breaking up anythin is one of easiest things we can do ,,"if only breaking up was done with a hard smile and thanksgiving handshake or hug!!!" ,,,i wished i had done it few times in my life ,,i felt very bad seein the abuse and the eventual break up ,,i felt it wrong ,,but i swim in the same culture they swim,,sumone sumday has to change --i want to witnes or be part of sumthin that  is good

                                 Nothin is permanent in life,,not even life ,,,then how come hatred,,,there is a answer --TIME---and maybe there is a answer for who  will be  part of a new beginning --YOU ,,sighning off with hope sumday i will write two blogs of this --one how i handled this in my life on some person in the  way i wished and how i got the same person back sum other time later in my life -on another blog  --just hoping -with hope there comes belief --with belief there will be a better tommorow --so im erasing the today memory with the same belief waiting for a tommorow like that :)

From memories about a vey special word called "Love"

                     Not my usual blog type but this was in my mind for long time --i feel this is to me a special blog -a blog which has every word as i wanted --:)

                                This is sumthin very different and very same many would have felt in their  lives -- last sunday when i met a good frd of mine there was this discussion abt a topic regarding blogs  -she was in love with sumone -everyone who knew me ,,knew me i was pretty poor at  the topic love ---and mockingly questioned me on whether i could write or quote a single line about love and bursting in wild laughter ---yes i could not write abt it much as i was dumb in that regard  but i could still copy from my memories from what sumone made me feel few years back -i cant remember every quote of hers or words as she was so smart a person with words,,with words she was magical ,,with feelings she was miraculous --i know its hard for any reader  to  get the same feeling i do ,,but i know u would appreciate the fact these words uttered were not bad nonetheless

            

               
              " Why the hell u love me --one good reason--her answer--i love u because "i feel myself with u  --a woman knows the face of man she loves as sailor knows a open sea "

              "I would have known myself better had i known u had loved me more than what i thought "

               

              " Im not asking what you have im asking whether u have me in u "

                 

             "  Love is not just beautiful it is wonderful "

               

             " My pains  painted my skies black --my heart wanted to paint  it in white by sumone --on being with u it became a rainbow "

             

             "  6 years have gone ---for all the pains in my life --i never knew i had a medicine called "love"--i want this medicine for life --hahaha

             " I met u by accident-- fell in love by incident --i guess incidents and accidents never bring surprises  but for me it brought me a pleasant one --my love"

         

             "When i saw u first the world did not stop ,,stars did not whirl around me ,,i did not miss a heart beat  ----all i felt was myself ---a complete myself -my moment had arrived and i did not miss to feel it thats all"

              "Im never asking return of favour to love me im asking a favour to allow me to love u as long as i live"  and many more which i dont remem now

                                       

                                            There was a old saying that i read sumyears back in a book--"Love will follow u all life--initally it will follow u in life -but u miss it -then u will follow it for life"--the timin is the key --u miss the timin --u miss the bus to happiness,,a journey with a known person to any distance seems easy and lovely--similarly lifes journey with a known person is far easier than with a stranger --distance might be less as might be the happiness with a new person  ,,thats why seizing the moment is very important ,,

                                          i missed it but not the feeling --i know how it is to feel that great word --now the next line is from me --let me try ---"To love was not in my dictionary --No one made me feel like u -long after u have gone --i still feel ur love --Love is immortal --through u i felt it  ---there is no other word which brings as much joy and pain as the word -"Love"-really with love there is life without it ,,,,,,,,,,!!!!

Dreams are tough challenges but always possible realities !!!!

                           Dedicated to my good friend Rinki tomar on her birthday

                              "Dreams are not just fantasies they r possible realities -the key lies in tryin to 

                                  aspire them --u become future inspiration by doing so to sumone "         

                            

      Happy birthday to my good friend  Rinki  Tomar ---Head  of "India Book of records" ,,a work that demands more than 30 days of non stop work more so ever its such a demanding job to be head of such concern which demands attention to minute details and from any corner of india to approve a record they have to see the full details -- A concern that was started purely with belief and lots of love ,,but more importantly started with purpose of achieving a dream that might have well been a dream considering the importance given to womens dreams in our society,,gone are the days when they are confined to the household and all their dreams are no more pages of unread book ,they make their dreams come true by sheer hard work and meticulous planning regardless of result

 http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/India-Book-of-Records/492764850622

                                               One scene in a tamil film really hit the nail on the head of where our society was some yrs back,,a school master asks his 3 rd standard students--the students(girls )were shown as to be answerin to the question of what u want to be in future?----one after one they were shown to stand up and blink or laugh innocently not knowin what to answer ,,maybe just in a cinema but it could not be more apt --girls in our society are expected to be good housewives and good  moms and b nothin other than that ABSOLUTELY NOTHIN MORE .

                                               My mother who was a remarkable person with unbelievable amount of talents ,,she was terrific at narratin lessons from book ,,,worked hard on english ,,remarkably wunderful in writing the right words for right situations ,,be it in writing for debates for us in  school competetions or any other stuff she was wunderful ,workers fell at ease with her-proving her management skills were goos as well ,,when now at this age i could recall how much she was talented but she refused to show it to the world thats what i feel ,,she could have inspired a lot of people in my opinion with loads of talent she had,but women are not brought up to be otherwise ,,its been the trend  for a long time ,,but times are changing ,,with better understanding ppl it has changed surely for good  ,,i do feel that now on seein the role of women in todays world they are marching towards brighter side of life with belief

                                              While i know the person who is inspiration for this blog Rinki for hardly few months --but what has been noticeable and really appreciable in her case is her dedication to her job not expecting immediate rewards and just givin her sincere attempts to make her dream a reality,,Probably the biggest challenge in life will be accepting your dream as a possibility and working towards that knowing its a big challenge,,Life is boring if we dont have challenges ,,but if challenges become magnified impossibilities then when achieved it is a monumental achievement --I m not sumone who knows 1000 people in this world ,,but the very few i know are really damn good ,,,Rinki-has  been a inspirin story of relentless hardwork that never depended on sucesss -but on accepting a impossible challenge as achievable miracle ,

Women have started to get their rightful recognition not by any forceful means but by consistent hard work towards oneday sharing the limelight in a world  that doesnt always have them in the front,its sign of better things ,better future and a happier world

                           Happy Bday sweet Rinki --have a blast and may god be with u in doing ur bit of continue to inspire people --and may there  be many more rinkis in this world --cant be happier than having a good human being and a hard workin person as a good friend,,its indeed a privelege,,Dreams are indeed possible realities!!!!

                                               

Sisters are always a synonym of support and unbridled love !!!

      

                     " Dedicated to my Sister who is celebrating her birthday today -Happy Birthday Raji"

                         (( **Special mention to Deepu,Gilly Seema,Pinku,Archu.Nithya ,Shabana and Priya tak(miss u piyu -wherver u r love u always ) all wunderful ppl  who made me feel proud to be their brother"**))

                       A quote about  sisters--"her eyes had tears when i was happy --her heart had tears when i was sad--the most silent and strongest relationship in this world is the one shared by a sister"

                                     Life has been cruel in many aspects but it has been kind in sum cases in my life -like my bodning with the word sisters,,made so special by some amazin ppl- im fortunate to have been blessed with some lovely girls who though not born with me took me as their brother and have shown some unbridled love which sumtimes make me think --"Am i this special "---im not boastin but im meaning it does sumtimes so !!!

                                   Rakshabandan is one function i look forward every year -- I have been tied quite a few number of Rakhis in life -its just a beautiful feelin to know there is sumone who loves u so much for just being a brother or like a brother ,i have cherished every moment  I had with them --my own sister -the only one i was born with remains a unique character -whether showin care,love or affection,,she remains sumtimes a mystery ,,a iron willed character but nevertheless sumone who helped me lot to shape myself into a better human being ,we all supported each other during tough times ,,now shes happily settled in her married life

                                   I guess having sisters guarantees u two things -unconditonal happiness and undeniable seperation,all the above people i mentioned have been a pillar of support to me sumtime or other,,,had sum wunderful moments wih few,,,there is nothin happier when u walk hand in hand with a sister --u can share things with confidence ,,u can exchange hard words and still have them holding ur hands despite anythin --sisters are special--every individuals "dream empire"is built with siblings support only,,our visions are best understood by our siblings ,,i have always had this feeling that a relationship that always remains silent  but strong is the one shared between a brother and sister

                                 Sum times their tears make us  better men,from my personal experience i know they plant the seed of confidence in us by being with us  and not merely by words -it doesnt need meeting of eyes or holding of hands to show their love,its beyond that--u can feel their presence without being nearby ,a strong sense of confidence that  come what may they are by your side ,,i have been very fortunate to have sisters who make me feel so much at home at time of needy despite me not even seen some of them ever and some i hardly see due to them being far away after gettin married .

                                   Sisters are like stars in our horizon --they seem so bright during our desperate times --we feel as long as they r there nothin is impossible --they remain always bright in our vision at those times,,and when we r shinging bright in our lives they hide themselves behind us to see us shine bright ,,sisters are that special ,a relationship that is hugely underplayed in our world --they are never given the limelight because they never want to have it --they want to share whatever they have with their brothers

                                We never say sorry to our  sisters,,we do anythin for them to see them happy ,,,yet we are never satisified because we want them to be happier and never be sad,,,thats the real meaning of the relationship--i have been fortuante enuf to be have   some  lovely sisters  who have been  wonderfully supportive, remarkably caring human beings all my life ,, who have  tolerated my sumtimes eccentric behaviour with more affection with grace and they continue to amaze me with their  unbridled love

                            i have got a huge respect for the relationsip and will strive to make it stronger ,,,sum relationships are unbreakable in our lives,,this is certainly one among them--for me a very ,very ,very special one ,,made special by some special people  and the one who is celebrating her birthday today --"Happy birthday again sister  --have a blast"

"Life's spirit lies in facing adversity --and not by accepting them easily"

       

     "There is a reason i see every dawn --despite my fears to not see them sumdays "

                                                                   (First of all i never expected sumtime back  to write another blog as i was in pretty sorry mindset for last few months ,,but one thing that never deserts me unlike other things in life  is my love for these words and for my passion for it never dies ,,it feels awesome to write few words again,,and to the lovely souls who read my blogs,however few it maybe its precious for me  --im grateful for that to all,its been a very tuf time indeed ,,hopefully its all goin into the past now )

                                                                   I have wondered why in life -words like happiness,smile ,love,,is often outshone by words depression,,tears and hatred ,,,i guess without these words te real essence of joy would have been missed in life,i realised many things just of recently ,,wishes are like dreams ---u can only visualise them ,,wishes rarely become realities !!

                                                                  The last 2 months have been the worst in my life ---because i was being pulled down to the extent of me reaching a level of depression --which i felt might drown me out ,,,wrong outlet of all the same led me to breakup with frd after frd --relation after relation--i began to hate myself because i started to doubt the credibility of my belief and willpower which were losin shape ,i sat down and thought bit of where im heading ---there were dark days when i thought i never wanted to see the dawn ,,but i saw and was pushed to see them --there was probably some reason after all

                                                                 Losing close people became mandatory,,losing special people became customary,,losing my best soulmate ,,losing sumone who had roses for my every tear and losing all i had for my heart to not break made me almost crumble --it was a case of  god sayin ---"be ready to lose many"--i wanted to reply  "i wont have any",,Here i stand now with almost all my precious beloved people lost for one reason or other ,,,yet i know crying or hitting the wall are no solutions,,frdship,family ,work environment were all not in good order ,,,but when i sat and thought of "Why im fearin even my existence --it should not be" because i have to do some of my responsibilities still ,,,my ambition is unfulfilled ,there are some dreams which are yet to be realised,,there is a long journey that has just started

                                                           I was missing sumone terribly for last fortnight --so much so one of my frds found out in my behaviour ---he just replied to me --"you are so lucky to have nice people in life--but sumtimes luck runs out on purpose ---you cant be omni good to everyone in this world --u have ur flaws -everyone has --u try to cover your flaws by tryin to adapt to everyone ---u have lost ur identity --find that --be urself --if u were meant to have them u will --if not let them go --be thankful for the memories -there will be others waiting for you to continue ur journey"

                                                        I was hearin dumbfounded by the magnamity of simple assesment of my situation --in other words he offered me my solution --i can live with pain but not with a clustered mindset ,,yes sumtimes truth hurts but nothin teaches u like truth -- I still dont wish to see some dawns but now  i m not afraid to face them--i have no reason to fear if i was myself always,, i will march on to my unrealised dreams with pains of course but not with fears anymore !!!

                                              "My new journey might be lonely--almost--i still have one or two to assist me --but this time it will be with me being as me --ready for anythin --ready to pay any price --ready to face my fate and play by my rules--"Lifes spirit lies in facin adversity --not being eaten by it "

The case of Miss Aruna Shaubang --there's a lesson for all to be learnt from her life

Aruna Shaubang then and now in semi coma stage !!


                             "Never give yourself a chance to accept revenge as a solution to anger "  
                                ARUNA SHAUBANG --i know this name about 1 yr or so back -- one of the most painful stories i have read in my life --a story about a hard working girl --who came from below poverty family and paid the ultimate price and the worse part is shes still suffering after 38 years!!!--i found some news of her that i could not even take my mind off ,the person who brutally raped her and left her in a dog chain in a bad state and left her to  semi coma is working in a hospital nearby ,,A guy named Sohanlal,, he left her in semi coma stage and brain dead state then for his supposed "revenge ",,shes now 61 ,,,(still survived by KEM hospital nurses and doctor )
                                I read the news that the guy had changed his name and is still working in some hospital after serving a term of 7 years ,because he was charged of "robbery of jewels"  ,talk about law taking it course probably its for only people with money ,,read that the case was not challenged against the convict because no one of her family wanted to fight for her or take care of her ,not to blame them either ,(poverty sumtimes makes people helpless leavin no options)  ,,she was abandoned for good ,,and now 38 years after  i read the shocking sad  news that her  well wishers on seein her suffering for so long requested for "Euthanasia "--its just harder to digest that the reason for the action was revenge by a mindless guy , it has been revealed shockingly the guy still lives sumwhere closeby working and living a normal life ina  hospital -how in the wide world is it fair?? - this wonderful lady has been in bed like a baby ,in semi coma  for close to 4 decades,,all the more reason that we should do our bit in making sure such things never occr in our surroundings
                               There was sumthing i felt heart warming in the final part though  --i read about the  journalist named PINKI VIRANI who had taken so much pain to know abt Madam Arunas case --had so much tried to help her ,,read that she has offered with her husband to do final rights to Madam Arunas inevitable  death if and when it happens ,In a country where appreciation and fame are the masks for everyone wish ,,its truly worth mentioning that there are people like Mrs.Pinki who has taken part of her life in tryin to help a wonderful lady get noticed for the misfortune she had in her life ,,
                                Revenge is the worst expression of anger ,,yet when the mind is not allowed to think it seems the best form of avenging a humiliation or embarrasment ,,in reality --its just few moments of madness that seperates from havin a normal life and one like Madam Aruna ,,even worse is the life of that guy Sohanlal ,,if at all i dont want to be one person in this whole world it will be that guy --his moment of madness ,,his form of revenge has put a person brain dead for nearly 40 years ,a lady who came out of her house at 18 to work out of poverty and that to in a noble proffesion like nurse ,cant imagine how much guilt that guy is having every day to relive that moment again and again,,
                              We would have situations where we would feel our anger will be best exhibited by takin some form of revenge ,,,but like this example revenge never does any good to anyone ,,it ends up with undeniable pain,,guilt till life and ignominous scars in our characters which will nevr leave till our time runs out ,,im have had this urge to do sumthin against sum ppl who left me stranded in the middle on few occasions ,,but sumhow i preferred personal agony and silence than out and out revenge ,,,reading such kind of stuffs makes me think revenge is nothing but a waste of energy which extracts plenty of agony ,tears and blood ,,probably we will be faced with more situations where it might be the only solution ,,but i do sincerly hope and do sincerly request that whilst u may u have anger which is human nature ,,never allow this thought of revenge to cross u ,,sumwhere if u have been right ---fate will prove that u have been so to that particular person --never have revenge  as a option because its not even worth to be a option --its sumthin that has to be sent to trash forever
                           For the love of  our lives--- let this wonderful life of Madam Aruna be the one of the kind and never wish to see anyone or any news as of hers in my life ,,not only in pain but in shame to know one of our human kind inflicted such a shameless act on  a fellow human being for his moment of satisfaction ,,and for his urge for revenge ,,every time u have the urge of that word ,,just rememeber this case(to me the guy is just living because god wants him to relive his shame every day than to die )
                          As far as my tribute to  this wonderful human being who has suffered so much for no fault of hers -"U have opened the eyes of many and will so in future sadly through your pains but it needs such pains to make people understand hard issues in life ,,, Im sure people will learn a lot from your life ,,May God be with u always and give u peace wherever u go from here  "

Learning to listen to others perspectives is a art worth learning !!!

                                  

                                 “Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.”

                                             This is what i got in mind -when a frd of mine said sumthin today morning that did not shock me but starltled me moreover for my reluctance to accept a frank outspoken comment as i was sumone who had swimmed long enuf in this societies rigid policies to allow sumone to have a frank opinion on a sensitive issue ,,On a whole i felt i m just a mere reflection of what this society has made us

                                             Had a very odd chat with one of my school mates in google talk ---had some funny messages exchanged initally when all of a sudden the topic diverted to something far more sensitive--He suddenly said to me "Dude whats the need to have temples ?dont u think that God is everywhere -I do believe god is everywhere -why waste money in building temples ?Now this frd of mine works in a highly reputed company, was a NIT passout ,,,a god believer alright --sumone who hits the nail on his head with his comments ,sumone who never does a cheap thing to make peoples head turn ,i was not taken back by his remark because it had some truth in it ,i was unable to digest the fact of him sayin sumthin against the guidelines our society has allowed us to grow and never allowed to go beyond it ,i felt it was purely a individuals perspective which our society never stops to hear ,,,

                                                 Its not that this was the only issue that irked me regarding we giving respect to others perspectives ,i was unable to attend a marriage of my frd that ended with his now wife not ready to listen my reasons and ended the frdship i had-just to quote a personal incident ,,,i had been guilty in one or two other instances --i regret them now but time never stops for anyone or gets rewinded to rectify a blunder,,,But this doesnt apply to our family members in most cases --Our dads scolding  us despite not listening our side of stories ,,our loved ones taking us wrong ,,,our best frds having issues with the same ,,all doesnt matter --therein lies the solution

                                               Try what may the difference between getting angered by a individuals perspective and listenin to them properly is just in "few extra minutes" -Even our Epics -Mahabharat and Ramayana depict that not listening to others might lead to bad things  --by no way im sayin listening to other perspectives is the solution to any sensitive stuff,,but its just essential to give ourselves those extra precious moments to judge whether we are right  to take a call in our own terms or settle to a one on one talk to end any potential rift

                                               " Its always worth to listen than to argue --arguement does no good --it ends whats good" ---In cases of our loved one we are always ready to spend those extra few minutes or give ourselves a opportunity to speak and clear any stuff ,,,that doesnt happen with people who are less important,,the number of people who are that important for us are  very less ,,but the people who are outside that circle is countless ,our patience will be tested no ends ,,but the only way to stop the ever nearing feeling of" hatred" towards sumone and  keep at bay our "inevitable ego "- is by giving ourselves an opportunity to learn the opposite parties perspective

                                               I took the word of the friend and for once felt the importance of listeningto others perspective is a art that has to be learnt for our society to move forward --Its us who form the society so its essentially our duty to make the changes need ,,,And learnin this art is a essential one alrite ,,im sure u will agree too,

See ya soon!!

"Frustrations" - sumthing that has to be conquered to realise our dreams "

          " No matter how frustrated we are ,god has not asked us to do  the impossible"--one of my most respected teachers told me this many years back,,i just got this in mind to write a blog about sumthin that i found no way of leaving out for time being now                

                            At a time of very tough self questioning and very examining situations of recent times made me say to a frd  "Buddy i feel lonely and lost ,,,i dont know where im heading ,,i seem in a heady mess --i see no reason to see life otherwise"--as i already said in one of my blogs im not a pessimist but a laidback optimist ,,but incident after incident ,,stress after stress ,,failure after failure ,,finally made me go to brink of sayin this to the person,,i was very frustrated with life --i was left to battle life on my own ,,,and i felt it was not wrong to say so 

                           That person ,,a very silent but strong charactered person who was sumone whom i never gave more respect than sumone known ,,,listened to me patiently ,,he knew he was not the first choice person i would goto  ,,he knew because i had no one really to talk and wanted to say few things to feel better i talked with him,,looked at me and said with a stern look,,look buddy i dont know much about you to help u,,but i can say only this" if u r lost dont worry u may still find alternative  route to your destination"

                           The chat got over ,,nothin much since i was not a revealer of my heart much to unknown persons --it just ended there---i was just thinkin incidents ---it was excruciating tough time --hard to say anything positive ,,because i knew certain things can never change ,it got me scared and worried ,,,after all its human nature how hard u try ,,,ur mind and heart are two different worlds which coexist in very few things in life ,pointing my situation to lack of support or communication from my close circle was merely a fact to divert the reality that i was not prepared to conquer a big demon which has started to acquire huge porpositions --a demon called "Frustration"

                          My frustration recently  grew very badly so much so i almost broke up with two of my best friends ,,before sanity returned ,,Right now i cannot see my destined direction,,,every direction seems to have a road block --every minute seems a hour ,,every frd seems pushing me into the door of darkness where there is no return ,,,everythin personal seems doomed--close to a deathbell ,,,but sumwhere deep inside there seems a desire burning --a desire to stand alone if fate made me so,,,,a desire to find a way to live with unfairness ,,a desire to accept the truth im one of the guys sitting on burning deck "but that desire seems to be a flickering light --in utter darkness-maybe it might be the only "Ray of Light " to find my alternative route to my destination and dreams  --JUST MAYBE"

                       If i leave my frustations to rule me --i will lose that little desire too --my only lifeline now seems that---i dont know whether i will find that desire but i know i have to conquer this seemingly endless frustrations to realise that ,,its not that simple ,,life offers you so many perspectives that you start to find the wrong reasons for refusing to accept truths 

                      No life is rosy from day one to the final chapter--there are many demons that we have to conquer to realise that there are many things one has to achieve --the dreams ,,the wishes ,the life we wish,the lifepartner we need to choose --everythin can be easily ruined by a few untamed demons --for me this is one thing i know tht sure is ,,im sumone who always believed tht life will even out sumwhere to be fair --its tht we need to be patient enough to see tht --easily said than done --but there are examples in the world ---in our family to prove it ,,,finally want to quote what sumone whom i respect even now whos is no more now said to me many years ago

       "Frustrations is never a option for me  because it has the power to change my opinion"(U were always right jaan --luv ya always )--I wish i had tht determination-but im sure i can conquer that in sumway --as i said life evens out sumwhere !!!!

Signing off with wishes that there are only conquerors in this world of such demons  ,,wink :)